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Michigan GOP candidate would like everybody to kindly ignore his arrest record for masturbating in cars and elect him to office.

Jordan D. Haskins, candidate for the state legislator, and public masturbator.

Courtesy of Raw Story:

A candidate running to represent Michigan’s 95th House district in the state legislature wants you to know that once you look past his bizarre sexual fetish and multiple felony convictions, he is a rock-ribbed conservative Republican, whose “stool of conservatism” is held up by “faith, family and freedom.”

Michigan Live reported Friday that Saginaw’s Jordan D. Haskins dismisses the arrests and prison time as the results of youthful indiscretion and said that he is ready to “move on from that and do what I can” to serve his state as a Republican state Representative.

“I have dreams,” Haskins said to Michigan Live, “and I want to make a difference.”

Haskins, 24, has served prison time in two states and is currently on parole, but there are no rules preventing him from running for the state House.

On four occasions between April of 2010 and January of 2011, Haskins broke into vehicles on public and private property, disconnected the ignition wires, then started the engine. As the wires snapped and spit sparks, Haskins would masturbate to climax in a sexualized ritual he calls “cranking.”

Haskins has lived in Michigan and North Carolina and has lengthy criminal records in both states, dating back to the age of 15. Early offenses had mostly to do with breaking into cars and going on joyrides.

“I was just a lonely, angry kid at the time,” he said. “If anything, I could be put on ‘World’s Dumbest Criminals.’”

Valid point, after all who hasn't broken into cars, hot wired them, and then polished the bishop while listening to the vehicle's engine turning over?

Well me for one.

And here I thought I was fairly well versed in deviant behaviors, and yet I have never even HEARD of this one.

And look I don't like to judge other people's sexual proclivities, but he guy DID get convicted for his, and this did not happen when he was an adolescent, but instead only three or four years ago.

Yeah if I were a voter in Michigan's 95th district I am pretty sure this would be more than enough to dissuade me from casting my vote for this guy.

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