World News Korner

After three year investigation, Scotland Yard deems case of MI6 spy found dead and locked in a bag, an accident. I'm sorry, what? Update!

Courtesy of the Guardian:

The MI6 spy found dead in a bag three years ago probably locked himself in the holdall and died as a result of a tragic accident, Scotland Yard has said.

Outlining the results of a three-year investigation on Wednesday, the Metropolitan police said Gareth Williams most likely died alone in his flat.

But Detective Assistant Commissioner Martin Hewitt said the police could not "fundamentally and beyond doubt" rule out the possibility that a third party was involved in his death.

Williams's naked body was found in the padlocked bag, with the keys discovered under his body, in the otherwise empty bath in his flat in Pimlico, central London, in August 2010.

Last year, a coroner concluded that Williams was probably unlawfully killed and his death the result of a criminal act. Following an eight-day inquest, the Westminster coroner, Dr Fiona Wilcox, said he was probably either suffocated or poisoned, before a third party locked and placed the bag in the bath.

But Hewitt said Scotland Yard's three-year inquiry had come to a different conclusion and that Williams was "most probably" alone when he died.

"Despite all of this considerable effort, it is still the case that there is insufficient evidence to be definitive on the circumstances that led to Gareth's death," he said.

"Rather, what we are left with is either individual pieces of evidence, or a lack of such evidence, that can logically support one of a number of hypotheses."

Hewitt added that the investigation had added "some clarity and detail" to the case, but that "no evidence has been identified to establish the full circumstances of Gareth's death beyond all reasonable doubt".

Look I don't want to tell Scotland Yard how to do their job but.....no scratch that, I really DO want to tell them how to do their job.

Listen when you find a naked dead guy locked in a bag, with the keys on the OUTSIDE of the bag, that pretty much rules out "accidental death."

I mean don't you think?

Seriously DON'T you think?

even if we were to entertain the possibility that this guy some hoe got off on zipping himself up naked in various pieces of luggage, HOW would locking the bag enhance that experience?

And while we are on the subject HOW in the fuck do you lock a bag from the inside, while leaving the keys on the outside?

My new rules is that if I am ever inclined to kill anybody I am flying us both to England first because apparently there you can get away with ANYTHING!

Update: Okay it appears that I read the part about the keys incorrectly, and that they were inside the bag instead of outside the bag. This changes the story from completely impossible to virtually impossible.

I continue to stand by my WTF response however.

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